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{C} is for Control: #AtoZChallenge

{C} is for Control

I’m at the gym sweating it out. Trying to beat the blues and kick the stress out of my life. It’s been a stressful few months. Initially I was pretty  zen around it, and then the melt down happened. I felt like that babe in the woods who had lost her way back home. I am clueless on where my Buddhahood has suddenly disappeared. And then I find my answers. It comes to me from my DH and then from a meeting I attend.

The DH says, “Let go of control. Do the best you can, without worrying of the outcome.” I realise I have been trying to control people, situations and to an extent myself, and the way I feel. I keep forgetting it is perfectly fine to be sad, upset or angry at times; as long as it doesn’t become part of my intrinsic nature. Every person has a different mindset, a different world view; who am I to control what they believe, how the behave.

Off late I have been a nagging and controlling Mommy to my children too. A chance conversation with an acquaintance at a mediation centre, brought forth a reminder and synchronously through my own thoughts and words. And the reminder are these lines by Khalil Gibran On Children from The Prophet:

They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love, but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.

I look outside my window and see the sun-kissed sky and the spring diffusing it’s warm golden hue and  burst of colours. I realise I have no control over the weather. This also means I have no role to play even when the weather is cold, dark, dreary or rainy. So if I can’t control the weather, how can I possibly control certain situations and people  in my life?

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Letting go of control helps me to live in the now, to appreciate the golden glow of the sun, to be free of baggages and angst. And most of all to be myself.

“Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over, instead of craving control over what you don’t.”
Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free

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My theme for this year’s Blogging from A-Z Challenge is April Anecdotes that are twenty-six compelling tales of some real people, and some not so real people. These tales will be surreal, peppered with a dose of non-fiction, but some might just be a figment of my over active imagination. You can read my theme here.

 

48 thoughts on “{C} is for Control: #AtoZChallenge

  1. Subroto says:

    Ah! I think I needed to read that today. Going through some changes in life and reading this reminded me that maybe I needed to have a little faith.
    Reminded me of the words from song from a movie I saw with my kids when they were much younger
    Let it go
    Let it roll right off your shoulder
    Don’t you know
    The hardest part is over?
    Let it in
    Let your clarity define you
    In the end
    We will only just remember how it feels

  2. anupriya says:

    Thank you so much for the lines by Khalil Gibran. I too strongly feel that we must do all that we can for our kids, yet not expect much in return. They have their own souls and their own karma to expend. Let the be.

  3. Shalini says:

    This is beautiful, Natz. I had to read this today. My hands are full these days – with both blogs, cooking, photography and the little Muffy. You made me realize that I needn’t be in control always.

  4. Soumya says:

    I had to read this today.

    I’m just back from a vacation and I was thrown into a pile of work. This coupled with the A to Z challenge, my work-outs, my reading and my household chores is beginning to take me down and I feel like I’m losing control of everything around.

    Now I realize that I don’t need to be in control all the time. I can let something slip, it is okay.

    I already feel good, thanks so much, Natasha.

    • Natasha says:

      I know that feeling Soumya and I’m so glad this post came to you ar the right time. Big Hugs. I’m sure you will feel better, once you decide to go with the flow and not have everything accomplished in a day’s time. After all we are humans and not super humans and I can see you do it all so well-blogging and juggling a full time job together is not easy.

      Big Hugs<3

    • Natasha says:

      Oh tell me about it Leanne. I continue to learn each day and even as I write this post, I realise I will require this reminder soon enough and stop controlling everything around me. :))
      Thank you for reading. And commenting.

      :))

  5. Shilpa Gupte says:

    It happens, Natasha. We all lose control over ourselves sometimes. But, you know what I have realised over the last year? Our hormones are also responsible to how we react to certain situations. On days when we are feeling confident and happy, we face any situation bravely, stay cool and pass the phase with ease. But, when things are chaotic with our hormones, that’s when we lose control over ourselves. It’s really a difficult situation. So, don’t stress over it so much, give yourself a lot of love, a lot of positive reinforcement and just experience the situation. It will pass.
    Hugs to you, my dear!

    • Natasha says:

      True, our hormones are pretty much haywire too Shilpa and those can make control freaks out of the best of us. I have seen that happening to my other girlfriends too.

      Big hugs back at you. <3

  6. Balaka Basu says:

    I was reading Happiness begins at home by Sensei where he clearly talks on our tendency as parents to control our kids. We should not try to control them as they have their own minds. Lovely write up Natz

    • Natasha says:

      Oh that’s one of my favourite books, Tina. Recently gifted it to these dear friends of mine. I love how Sensie and his lovely wife Kaneko, write about these little precious nuggets from our family life. And I remember the passage you are talking about.

      Thank you for your lovely words, Tina. <3

  7. Anurag Bakhshi says:

    It is not easy obviously, but going with the flow IS the only path to mental calm and happiness. I loved the parts about the parent-children relationship, had read this one by Gibran before, but it fit in so nicely with your thoughts here.

    • Natasha says:

      Of course somethings could go as planned, but if they don’t, it’s best to accept them as they are; instead of trying to mope over what went wrong. That’s what I feel. Easier said than done, but when done, helps relive a lot of unnecessary baggage.

      Heading to read you brand new tongue twister. 🙂

    • Natasha says:

      That’s not an easy one either. Maybe it’s about arriving at some sort of balance and going with that, Ramya. Thank you for reading and commenting. 🙂

  8. Tina Sequeira says:

    Hi Natasha! I am loving your poignant musings for this year´s challenge. This one is exactly what I needed to read. Control and even comparisons are something that we can do away in our life. Easier said than done thought. But, as long as we are aware and try, things should be better. Keep them coming! 🙂

    • Natasha says:

      Dearest Tina <3
      So glad you are enjoying my posts. Working on writing some livelier posts in the coming days, along with these reflective ones.

      Heading over to your blog soonest. All the very best. You will ace it like you always do. 🙂

    • Natasha says:

      Thank you so much for reading my dear nephew. Means a lot. Keep swinging by when you have time from Mark Zuckerberg’s grand corporate kingdom. Hugs.

  9. Meha says:

    Such a poignant post Natasha. We would lead much happier lives if we understand that we cannot possibly control everything. Great thought.

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